Homeschooling Isn’t Always Fun—and That’s Okay

We’ve all been there—the days filled with fun, joy, excitement, and never-ending curiosity. The days when homeschooling feels like this is it. We’re doing great. The kids are learning, thriving, experiencing things we never had time for before.

But then one day, out of nowhere, your child looks at you and says,
“I hate homeschool.”
“I want to go back to public school. I’m not happy.”

Whew. That one hits.

I know for me, I’d be confused. Like… wait a minute. I thought we were having fun. I thought things were going really well. We’re learning so much and doing all the things! And if I’m being completely honest, I think most of us would feel upset. We might start questioning ourselves, feeling like failures or swing to the other extreme and feel frustrated with our child.

But let’s pause for a moment and reflect.

Why is my child suddenly having these big feelings?
Was it something I said? Something they experienced? Something they saw? Or was it something the enemy quietly whispered that they’re now running with?

It’s not always “our fault” when kids express hard emotions. Those moments are actually invitations—signals telling us it’s time to pay closer attention. This isn’t the moment for lectures or the “my way or the highway” approach. Children are allowed to have feelings. Our job as parents is to help them navigate those feelings, helping them discern the difference between I’m bored and something deeper is going on.

When I first started homeschooling, whew…it was rough.

Even as an experienced educator, I still had to learn how my kids learned, what they liked, how they processed information, and how they behaved in a “classroom” setting. (They had been in public school from preschool through second grade.) On top of that, I was unknowingly taking a public-school-teacher mindset and applying it to our home. Big mistake.

My oldest daughter—she was in first grade at the time—would cry and whine about missing her old school and her friends. Our homeschool days were somehow longer than public school days, and I was genuinely confused. I had bought the best curriculum for her learning style. We had a schedule. Field trip days. Library days. The whole shebang.

And yet…she was still frustrated. Still crying.

I won’t lie, I lost my cool a bit. I remember thinking, Girl, how are you upset right now? You get to wake up later, stay in your pajamas, choose field trips you actually want to go on…what more do you want from me?! (Yes, I definitely laughed at myself later.)

Eventually, I took it to the Lord. And through my mentor, the Lord spoke to me so gently it caught me off guard.

You need to be more involved.
No more telling the kids to get on the tablet, log in, and do the work.
You need to be intentional.

I was like…I am intentional.
And in a quiet whisper, He said, No, you’re not.

Y’all. I was shook.

The very next day, I changed everything. I cut our five school days down to four. I stopped being so militant and softened my approach. I switched curriculum—yes, right in the middle of the year (because if it’s not working, it’s not working). We started our mornings with devotion and prayer before any schoolwork.

And slowly…things changed.

I asked my daughter why she had been so upset about homeschooling, and she told me she just wanted me to be more present, more kind, and to help her when she was struggling. I had often gotten irritated when she didn’t try right away.

Just a few intentional changes made a world of difference.

Now don’t get me wrong there are still days when my kids are just not having it. And that’s okay. We talk about big feelings. We pray about them. We lay them at Jesus’ feet and keep it moving. Some days, we don’t do school at all and guess what? They don’t fall behind. Other days, we talk about perseverance and pushing through hard things, because finishing something difficult and saying “I did it” is an accomplishment worth celebrating.

We celebrate wins. We talk about losses. And we remind ourselves that in the game of life, you’ll win some and lose some—and that’s okay too.

So if your child is struggling…upset…or wanting to give up on homeschool—pause. Take a break. Revamp the plan. If they’re older, talk about the root cause. Ask what’s really going on. Maybe they’re bored. Maybe they’re not being challenged enough. Maybe they’re lonely, especially if they’re an only child and feeling disconnected.

Be real. Be honest. Be present.

Don’t ignore them. Don’t chastise them. Love them with the love of Christ.

And remember: homeschooling isn’t always fun… and that’s okay.

Shalom, Lonny Adhi